2014-10-18 14.46.34Janine blog – Diary Of A Loser

22nd October 2014

Alana had mentioned a few times about bushwalking – not something I had ever done or ever wanted to do but she loves it – and I love hearing about her adventures… but then she said she would take me one day – the fear of God overshadowed me in that moment then I just though nah – it wont happen – I will be sick that day – or hurt my ankle or think of some awesome excuse – I had no desire whatsoever to go off traipsing through the bush for “fun”!
Then the day arrived….. I tossed up the idea of making an excuse but then I thought oh why not – I can always turn back if its too hard – what’s half an hour or so of walking on a flat track – I can cope with that.. and that’s what we did – walked for about 20 minutes along a skinny but fairly easy track beside the Mersey River – when we made it to the platypus viewing area at Shale Rd I was pretty impressed with myself – I had bushwalked like a pro – I had done it – whoo hoo!!! We sat and had a short rest watching the kids skimming rocks on the water in the sun – a gentle breeze cooling us off after our walk. Then Alana said ok are you ready to move on – thinking we were in for a bit more of the same I was quite happy to continue – we went up a bit of a rocky track which I almost refused to travel but I gave it a go and then we turned left and faced the biggest hurdle of my life…. LARGE rocks that had to be climbed over to continue – I just laughed – AS IF I can do that – I turned and looked behind me for the quickest safest escape route but realised that going backwards was possibly the harder option… oh dear – now what – ok its either live here on this rock or keep going…. So I kept going – I touched dirty rocks – wet rocks – I stepped in mud and in water – I walked onwards and upward and upward and upward then downward and upward and climbed over fallen trees and despite being pretty warm and sweaty and huffing and puffing = the absolute beauty of that place did not escape me – it was so tranquil and pretty…. We walked and walked chatting away and after 2 hours I could see the red of my car through the trees below – I had survived!!! I had made it!!!!
That bushwalk was harder – further – longer – more rocky and uphill than I had ever walked in my life – and yet despite being certain at the bottom of those rocks that I could not possibly do it – I did it – and more!!! I am still shocked that this body can actually do such an active walk without killing me – and the best part is – I actually enjoyed it!! I now realise that I really do hold myself back out of fear and out of thinking I cant do things – I am tired of watching others live while I just survive!
I have now researched nature trails in the area and plan to do a lot more walking so that next time I face those rocks – I will be more prepared and fitter and stronger and I will make them my B@TCH!!





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